Today I went to my local drugstore looking for some sort of moisturizer to put under my eye. The face lotion that I’ve been using doesn’t work; I need something with more “moisturizing power.” In the past, I didn’t really bother with lotion. It was too much of a hassle. Now, I don’t want people to think that I have some sort of disease with this dry patch of skin under ONE eye, so I’d better do something about it! It’s a bit curious that the other side is okay… Any dermatologists out there?
Going to the lotion section, the sleek shape and deep metallic blue color of this Vaseline Lotion for MEN (all caps!) bottle caught my eye in the sea of pastel pinks, yellows, blues, and lavenders. Note the clenched fist in the background of this ad:
FIST! STRONG! RESILIENT! POWERFUL! MANLY LOTION!
MEN is even in all-caps in the product’s official webpage url: http://www.keepingskinamazing.com/Product.aspx?Path=Consumer/OurProducts/MENLotion!
Blatant product differentiation at work here! But maybe a bit of reverse psychology on me… I quickly picked it up as a maybe.
The pump design in a bottle of that shape is a bit odd… But I digress.
Seriously… Lotion for MEN? You might as well use Udder Cream!
I’m NOT knocking Udder Cream. It’s actually a great product that does the job. I used to use it when I was working in the lab and washing my hands every time I turned around. It just has an awful “odorless” smell, so I would never buy it for myself.
Still scanning the shelves, my eyes locked on a very curvaceous lavender bottle with the words “Melt Away Stress Lotion” that was obviously designed with the female market in mind, and I couldn’t help but laugh out loud in a reflex reaction. I’m sure the woman next to me must have thought I was crazy. “Clinically shown… to melt away daily muscle tension…” In which clinic??? “With AROMASOOTHE [trademarked!] shown to quiet your senses…” What does quieting my senses even mean??? And why would I want them quieted???
Let’s pass on that one…
Curél’s Life’s Stages Lotions were the next to get my attention… Seriously??? “Menopause and Beyond” lotion??? I haven’t even gotten to the “First Signs of Aging” stage yet! Or have I? In any case, I definitely haven’t gotten to the “Pregnancy and Motherhood” stage yet! If you go to their website, they even have slick sexy graphs that “justify” their products… Right…
So I’m not a girly lotion person. Or I WASN’T until I got hooked on Bath & Body Works’ magnolia blossoms BODY CREAM (not just the lotion!).
I loved the thickness of this product and LOVED LOVED LOVED the smell! Alas, of course the only “girly” fragrance that I liked was discontinued, which is why I use the past tense. Sigh… What does that say about me??? It says that I still have the Vaseline Lotion for MEN in my hands!
Until I see this:
Really, I was considering slathering the old standard, Vaseline petroleum jelly, under my eye to see if that would do the trick. It helps with a chafed nose during runny, constantly-blowing-your-nose season! But okay, I’ll pay a little more for this bit of product differentiation – for this Vaseline Petroleum Jelly Cream that is “as effective as 100% pure Vaseline Petroleum Jelly.” That’s the line that ultimately sold me!
Now where is that “10 items or fewer” check-out lane?